What do Values & Goals have to do with mental health?
How to think about aligning your values with goals to enhance mental health . . .
When it comes to mental health, the connection between your values & your goals is incredibly important. Learning how to recognize and define your values can have a positive impact your well-being.
When we set goals, we often set them from a place of results. We think about what we want and work backward. And while that's not a bad way to approach it, a key piece is often missed . . . the true driver of the goal.
Having knowledge of your values can help you determine if your goals are genuinely what you want to work toward or if they're being driven by something outside of yourself.
Aligning your values to your goals not only helps the "staying power" of your effort but also helps you create more continuity throughout your entire life.
Self Esteem, Clarity, Well-Being & Resilience are all significant to good mental health. As you read through each section, think about your own values and how they apply.
Do your goals support the following parts of your mental health?
Self Esteem
When you identify your personal set of values, you're likely to feel more confident and aligned in your actions. Meaning, you have a solid understanding of who you are, what you stand for, what you will & won't tolerate . . . thus, your actions mirror those beliefs.
When your actions are out of alignment with who you truly are, you may feel anxious, depressed, stressed, and have a difficult time believing in and staying true to yourself.
Knowing your values and setting goals in line with them helps you define what your day can/will look like and encourages you to live YOUR life, not a life that others expect you to live.
What are your values?
Do you live by your values or are you in a constant battle with people pleasing and trying to achieve things for others?
Clarity
Identifying your values allows you to gain clarity with who you are and who you're working to become. Values act kind of like a compass, guiding your actions, relationships, and the direction of your life.
When you have a sense of who you are, you cultivate a sense of purpose . . . which makes your days reflect a sense of fulfillment.
Do you exercise your values each day?
Do you think about how they apply to daily life?
Are your personal values tied to your goals?
Well-Being
If your values are like a compass, your well-being is like a checkpoint, letting you know you're headed in the "right" direction.
If you're too focused on "going somewhere" without direction, you can get lost and start to feel dissatisfied.
Without considering your values in the process, this is where many of my clients feel like they're "working so hard but never getting anywhere."
Do you feel like you're "getting somewhere" with your current goal(s)?
Are you missing something in life but not sure what it is?
If you've ever felt like you set a goal and "lost your way," what do you think happened? Was it because the goal was "empty" and didn't genuinely mean something to your life?
Resilience
Our values are a big part of what keeps us going. When things get tough, knowing what you stand for can give you strength.
Resilience enables you to pursue through difficult times.
However, it can be extremely difficult to persevere when you don't know what you stand for. When you don't feel 'driven' by something deep within you.
In terms of resilience and goals, the "bounce-back" is important. We're not robots and we're not perfect.
There will be times when you're going to fall off, fall apart and fall away from what you're working toward.
BUT, being able to have the awareness of what's happening, what caused the derailment and the ability to call on your values to redirect you is HUGE for the process!
When you set a goal and the novelty wears off, what do you tend to do?
When you "make a mistake" or you veer off the path from what you're working toward, how soon are you able to make a course correction?
HOW TO PUT THIS INTO PRACTICE
f you aren't sure what your values are, Google "list of values" and see which ones resonate. There's no shame in not knowing!
Choose 5-7 that fit your life (you can always tweak them as you increase your awareness) and then write down your current goals.
Take note of which values fit with your goals, if any.
If you aren't able to match your personal values with your goals, ask yourself the following questions:
Are these my values or ones that have been taught to me?
Do I truly believe in these values?
Do these goals make sense to me or did I set them because someone else said I "should," or I'm trying to please someone else?
Do I need to reevaluate my goals to align better with my values?
HERE ARE A COUPLE EXAMPLES SO YOU CAN SEE HOW THIS LOOKS . . .
EXAMPLE 1: A client says her health is one of her top values. Yet ALL of her goals are focused on her career and earning potential. While that's not "wrong," she needs to ensure that she has an understanding of what her goals mean to her AND/OR she can make sure she adds a simple goal to her day/life so that she's ensuring she's reinforcing the value of health while she pursues her career goals.
EXAMPLE 2: A client states that he values enjoyment and friends, yet spends a ton of his free time sleeping, in the house or alone. Again, there's nothing "wrong" with his actions but he's beginning to feel depressed and like something is missing in his life. Setting a goal to support his value of fun & socializing will help him create a plan to combat the loneliness and ensure he's regularly making time for the things he knows make him happy (i.e. the time with his friends).
Here's a list of Values I hear a lot in my office . . . do any of them resonate with you?
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Talk soon,
Lori